Tag Archives: roommates

Moving Out Is a Pain

Slumbering through school at the moment, my mood is getting the drop on me while I pour over the apartment listings.  Weirdly enough, I don’t have too many options for one bedroom apartments or studios.  I did try to move out in the middle of winter.  Also tried to apply to an income based housing complex – turned down because my dad claimed me as a dependent on his taxes last year.  Ouch.  Like, seriously, that’s not cool!

Already told my roommate when I was planning on moving out and everything was sorted until really, two weeks ago when both our plans failed. Miserably.  They just jumped off the cliff of awesomeness and swan-dived into the pit of despair.  So I sat my roommate down and told him what was up with me and that I’ll probably be around.  I also told him I’m not going to just straight up ditch him – cause that’s a b*tch-*ss move and I still value our friendship.  He was thankful, we broke bread (essentially) and everything is pretty much at a standstill until then.

Guess I have time to save more money and get some other things aligned?  Found out my moms are buying me some furniture for my new apartment (something I was looking forward to until I realized I’m pretty broke).  TTOTT Bless their souls!  For the most part, there are a lot of good things about moving out later versus now.

– I have a place to live

– I’m taking a photo class; my roommate graduated with a MCOM degree with an emphasis in Photography

– Time to save

– Could possibly be decent at driving with some practice

– Summer might mean more available apartments?

In the end, we’ll shall soon find out.

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Rules of Courtesy for Roommates

Condom packages on dining room table.  One used, empty.  The other still waiting.  Flour all over the kitchen counters, sink full of dishes and apartment air muggy.  Coffee table with dirty dishes, one plate with food still on it and two cups.

Here are some rules to help you and your roommate get along:

1)  Communicate:  when a problem arises, nip it in the bud and take care of it then and there.  The longer someone goes without speaking the more habitual and OK it becomes.  Listen to one another and find a good middle ground or compromise.

2)  Respect your roommate:  you are sharing a living space so ample amounts of respect needs to be had on both sides.

A)  If you make a mess, clean it up ASAP

B)  If you’re roommate’s sleeping and it is within their normal sleeping range, be quiet.

C)  Do not eat their food unless you’ve been given permission or have an arrangement set up beforehand.  If

     they have offered you some of their food or you’ve been given permission, check with them every time before

     you do – just in case.

          – this also applies to their things.  Coming back to a broken T.V. and no explanation or apology really hurts

          relationships

     D)  If you are going to have guests over, check with your roommate.

– Guests are guests:  not extra roommates

– monitor your guests and make sure they are respectful to your place and your roommate and their things

– Boyfriends/Girlfriends:  try to keep the PDA levels at a minimum.  Please don’t go munching on each

others faces and grabbing you-know-what while they are around.  Teasing each other is ohk.  Starting a

porno on your couch in front of your roommate is not.

:  Sex is good and healthy, in certain doses.  Your roommate doesn’t need to hear you and your SO

going at it all the time though.  If you’re planning on having sex, give your roommate a heads up.

If your planning goes around the time that your roommate is due home and you haven’t given them a

heads up, plan as if they are coming home an hour early.

:  unless your romantic partner is living with you lease wise, they do not live with you.  It’s super

awkward to come back to find someone else’s stuff in your space.  It is also super awkward when you

see them as frequently as your roommate or more often.

:  for god’s sake, clean up too!


3)  Be Mature:  don’t be passive-aggressive!

“My roommate and I sometimes leave our things in common areas (for example the living room, kitchen).  Some nights I would come back home after he finally decided to clean and find all those things tossed into my room.  Literally tossed.  What really pissed me off was how much of his stuff still remained in the living room.  It was like I didn’t live there sometimes.”

It’s mean.  It’s evil.  And it can be downright fun sometimes.  However, your first response to situations should always be to communicate the idea that something’s not working out.  If tossing empty boxes of their newly bought toys doesn’t work, straight up tell them to take out the trash.  Bottom Line:  effectively communicate with one another.

4)  Know When to Call it Quits

It’s sucky.  You’ve tried to communicate with your roommate and it’s failed.  You’ve pleaded with your roommate to shape up and they just shrugged it off.  If you keep beating your head against the same wall and nothing is changing and you only wind up with a worse headache, you’ve reached insanity.  This is the point when you should seriously consider moving out.  Sometimes communication fails.  Sometimes they don’t care enough about the things that bother you to change or improve upon their bad habits.  Sometimes you can’t make compromises.  Whatever the reasons if your home is no longer a home, or a sanctuary, you need to get out.  You should always look forward to coming home to recharge and get some R and R.

Stress needs to be managed and it can involve something drastic:  like moving out.  It’s can be scary (I know)!  You’re leaving an established abode and traveling into the unknown.  But if you don’t make an effort to change something you’re not going to feel any better.

I’ll write up a little post on how to move out later.  Probably once I start my own process because my current living arrangement isn’t working out.

Friends are dandy and all, and living with them can lead to good times.  But you either become closer than ever before or you become the murder suspect.  Take Away:  Good friends don’t always make for good roommates.

Roommates

So far there have been five roommates in my life over three years of living with people whom I wouldn’t consider my legal family. I’ve noticed some things, some differences in the way we behave versus the way I behave and cross the counter with everyone.

Two are engaged: and shall be known as the Engaged couple
Perfect goes to the first roommate.
Awesome goes to the second roommate.
Guy goes to the third roommate.

Some thing I have noticed so far: all the girls I have lived with and the Engaged, have always always brushed their teeth first thing in the morning. I do this as well – my mother and I had a “tragic” upset one lovely holiday morning while at her relatives place for Christmas. I think it is strange but all those ingredients better be protecting my teeth! Secondly, Perfect was the most meticulous about appearance. I can’t call them vain because I picked it up and it’s fun and feels great to look the best I can. Even in plain dress-up. Then follows would be me, honestly, then Engaged and Awesome are tied. Guy goes last. I should live with more single guys I think. So far I hear stereotypes in my head but there really aren’t many I find that spend much effort in starting off their day “right” – as my mom called it. Or at least this morning as I thought about it – he went straight for the tele and Dark Souls which he has been spamming on my XBox because he’s bored of his XBox One games.
On the list of who cares more about their appearance, we have different ways of tackling the issue. Awesome roommate worked out. A lot. Even while she was sick. Engaged and I had trouble getting her to sit still. She dressed casually and was going for that certifiable banging body – in her case she wanted to slim down her thighs which really weren’t that fat at all. They were smaller than mine. Perfect was already skinny from the get go with nice curves (I’m a little biased, I was engaged to this person). She addressed it by dressing in cute clothes and putting on make-up. Unless she wasn’t going out. Then she said, “Fuck it!” and just chilled with me. Engaged were casual and were pretty content whichever way they were. I thought that was really cool. Guy is somewhat… I’m not sure. He does not easily give into letting his thoughts out but I’m sure he has had some acceptance though displays signs of wanting to change.
Some casual things. I wonder what more will I see.